Gai never felt the long years more than when he made the mistake of becoming attached, and this one threatened to have every second weighing down the scales. All that time, all his crimes, sinking to the table, unable to hold its own against light honest hope and studied naiveitee.
Elliot wasn’t a fool. Even if he weren’t stationed in a war zone, he would still have known what people could do to one another. Yet, still he believe they were inherently good, that each and every one could be reached. It was almost cliche, but Gai found himself wishing Elliot would never have to learn he was wrong. That he would grow old and grey still beliving he could help them if only he discovered how.
That Gai would be there to see the same fire still bright in that old man’s eyes.
Ridiculous, really. He knew better. If anything, his prescence would tip the scale, spill darkness from his side to Elliot’s, prove to him not everyone could be saved. It wasn’t like he hadn’t lived through this enough to know all the steps by heart.
And it didn’t matter. Even as he told himself he shouldn’t, he knew he would try. All this time, and he’d learned nothing at all.